Snack Tray Review

On a flight yesterday evening I was offered a "snack tray" by the "flight attendant." Heck, why not? It's paid for, and I was a little hungry. I was also a bit intrigued, as I had never been offered a "snack tray" on an airplane before. Normally, you get a "meal" or a "snack," but what this "snack tray" is all about, I know not.

She hands me the tray, and it is indeed just that - a tray. There is a cellophane cover over this plastic tray protecting a number of different snack items. I remove the wrapper and enjoy the simple pleasure of sating one's curiosity. First, I see water crackers... good. Then some peppercorn ranch cheese spread... hmmm... Then I see good old M&Ms - they're going in my bag for my daughter. Oh, and what appears to be nuts and raisins - good.

And then I see it. A small package of about half a dozen coin-sized salami rounds. I am skeptical, but could they really serve this if it was awful? So I decide to try these first, in case they aren't good. In that case I can always eat everything else to wash the flavor away. In retrospect this was a good decision. I open the package... sniff, sniff... OK, kind of resembles salami. I taste one. WOW - this is BAD! I search the ingredients list, but there is none. I am pretty sure "dog ass" is the main component of these horrible, horrible snack tray items. I pass on the rest of them.

After consuming some cheese-spread-coated crackers, the taste of the salami no longer lingers on the tongue, but it will certainly haunt my nightmares for months. I try to further suppress the badness by eating the nuts and raisins, but much to my chagrin the package contains a large number of white chips. While I initially assumed them to be white chocolate (blah!), they are actually "yogurt baking chips." That's a big pass, but I did manage to pick out the nuts and raisins for a salvageable snack.

So, overall the snack tray is a mixed bag... er, tray. I'd definitely recommending bringing something yourself if your only other on-plane dining option is a "snack tray." And if you are even thinking of trying the salami, I'd advise you to scald your tongue severely with some boiling oil or something beforehand. You'll probably also need to disable your olfactory senses as well through chemical or mechanical means.