It's Coming - Brace Yourself

Of course I am talking about the Apple iPhone. And I don't mean "brace yourself for this new, awesome piece of life-changing technology." No, I mean "brace yourself for nonstop blathering from the Steve Jobs cult followers."

Sure, I like a cool piece of technology as much as the next guy... more than most really. But I do and always have despised the Apple corporation and everything they stand for. Bear in mind, I acknowledge that they have done some good things, and in fact think that many aspects of OS X, the iPod, and even the iPhone are innovative and worthwhile. On the other hand, they charge too much for too little, focus on appearance and flash rather than substance, and brainwash their minions into believing the Apple way is the only and/or best way, when it almost never is.

So, I'll just sit here with my homemade PC, running MS Windows, attached to my Creative Zen Vision:M media player and Blackberry 8700c cell phone. Somehow I'll survive, if the iDrones with their new phones don't drive me to kill myself.

Snack Tray Review

On a flight yesterday evening I was offered a "snack tray" by the "flight attendant." Heck, why not? It's paid for, and I was a little hungry. I was also a bit intrigued, as I had never been offered a "snack tray" on an airplane before. Normally, you get a "meal" or a "snack," but what this "snack tray" is all about, I know not.

She hands me the tray, and it is indeed just that - a tray. There is a cellophane cover over this plastic tray protecting a number of different snack items. I remove the wrapper and enjoy the simple pleasure of sating one's curiosity. First, I see water crackers... good. Then some peppercorn ranch cheese spread... hmmm... Then I see good old M&Ms - they're going in my bag for my daughter. Oh, and what appears to be nuts and raisins - good.

And then I see it. A small package of about half a dozen coin-sized salami rounds. I am skeptical, but could they really serve this if it was awful? So I decide to try these first, in case they aren't good. In that case I can always eat everything else to wash the flavor away. In retrospect this was a good decision. I open the package... sniff, sniff... OK, kind of resembles salami. I taste one. WOW - this is BAD! I search the ingredients list, but there is none. I am pretty sure "dog ass" is the main component of these horrible, horrible snack tray items. I pass on the rest of them.

After consuming some cheese-spread-coated crackers, the taste of the salami no longer lingers on the tongue, but it will certainly haunt my nightmares for months. I try to further suppress the badness by eating the nuts and raisins, but much to my chagrin the package contains a large number of white chips. While I initially assumed them to be white chocolate (blah!), they are actually "yogurt baking chips." That's a big pass, but I did manage to pick out the nuts and raisins for a salvageable snack.

So, overall the snack tray is a mixed bag... er, tray. I'd definitely recommending bringing something yourself if your only other on-plane dining option is a "snack tray." And if you are even thinking of trying the salami, I'd advise you to scald your tongue severely with some boiling oil or something beforehand. You'll probably also need to disable your olfactory senses as well through chemical or mechanical means.

Pipe Smoking in our Culture

I am an unapologetic pipe smoker. For me, it is not an addiction but a great pleasure in my life. There are few things more relaxing than sitting out in my humble backyard on a Summer evening, reading a book with pipe and beverage in hand.

That said, let me share these 2 great articles I found linked in a forum: Washington Post and NY Sun.

If you smoke a pipe, these are must-read articles. If you don't smoke a pipe, this will give you a lot of insight into what it's about from a cultural perspective. Maybe you'll be inspired to try out this hobby. Go ahead and let me know if you want some advice on the subject.

Crazy New Technology

This video is perhaps the coolest computing technology I've seen in years. Check it out.

Travel and Blogging

I think I may have figured out why I was lazy about blogging for a while there... I wasn't really traveling much. Well, with my new job that has changed. I am traveling more. And with more travel comes more things to write about.

So, over the last 3 weeks, here are things I've seen while traveling (in no particular order):

- A car service driver not paying attention to the red or green lights above the toll plaza on the NJ Turnpike. This forced him to go through an EZPass lane, but he has no EZPass. He then proceeded to go ballistic on a human toll collector at the next booth. He also used some racial epithets to refer to that toll collector that I will not repeat here. You know, he did have plenty of time to change lanes once he realized that the cash lane he was driving toward was closed. Of course, when your in the car with the raving driver, you should best keep those opinions to yourself.

- A circular double rainbow. I saw this while landing at the Detriot airport looking out the window of the plane. Very cool. "Oh Rain-BOWS... oh yeah, those things are cool." Surprisingly, the terminal of the Detroit airport that I went through was quite nice. Not at all like Robocop (but, to be sure, this isn't in Detroit proper).

- Fantasy Suites. A hotel in KoP, PA had a circular hallway on the top floor. Each room was a different fantasy suite. The theme of each room was described in words and with graphics on the front of the door. So there's the "King for a Night" suite, the "Hall of Mirrors" suite, the "Arabian Nights" suite, etc. A word to the wise - whatever you're thinking of doing in those rooms, someone else has already done it (and lots worse).

- California is another planet. Seriously. We all know smoke is bad, blah blah blah. The hotel in which I stayed in CA has no smoking inside, of course. Outside, while there are no chairs, tables, or even tobacco disposal containers, they figure people still must smoke there. So the state of CA was nice enough to post a sign saying that, since smoking isn't prohibited in this area, it must contain chemicals known to them to cause cancer, death, political incorrectness, etc. The nanny state is upon us.

- Stereotypical old lady terrified of flying. You know who I mean. She's probably around 70, maybe older. Overweight. Speaks with some kind of indescript accent. Crosses herself and murmurs constantly during takoff, landing, and any time you can feel the plane moving. Makes inane conversation (mostly complaining) with you even though you're wearing your headphones. Sits next to me.