SkyMall - Fitness Items

Here are a few fitness-related gems from SkyMall I'd like to discuss today:

The GiddyUp! Core Exerciser looks to provide, uh, an interesting workout. I'm not going to lie... I find this photo too good not to stare at. Do you think the model felt uncomfortable posing for this shot? The only things missing here, in my vivid imagination, are handcuffs.

You know you're going to get the high intensity workout of your life with the Pedal Pusher. Seriously, why bother? Why not just chew gum or fiddle with a pen or something? You'll probably burn the same amount of calories and break the same sweat.

I'm a big fan of properly executed push ups as a top notch upper body exercise. But do I really need to spend $40 of my hard-earned American dollars on The Perfect Pushup to get those benefits? Have we really been fooling ourselves all these years thinking regular push ups were actually helping us? How can they be effective without the rotary handle motion of these gizmos?

And let's conclude this roundup with the MF-180 Exercise Monitor. I think monitoring your heart rate might - MIGHT - have some benefit. There's certainly a market niche for them. But couldn't I do without having to join the Borg collective hive? No, I obviously MUST buy this item because, well, resistance is futile. You'd be one stupid "MF" to pass this offer up.

SkyMall - Hot Dog Contraption

As promised, here's my first stab at bringing your attention to the fine merchandise featured in the SkyMall catalog. What better item to feature than this innovative hot dog griller and bun warmer?

Few people eat as many hot dogs over the course of a year than I do. But OH THE DRUDGERY of making hot dogs myself at home! In a typical middle-class home like mine, I am limited to using a pot of water, the microwave, the toaster oven, or the grill. How unbearable!!

But with this new labor saver, "it's easy to make great tasting baseball franks right in your own home." Thank you!! Thank you for inventing this find product. I'm sure the amount of counter space I dedicate to it will be well worth the convenience of ballpark quality frankfurters in my home kitchen.

Do you realize that this device is perhaps the best if not the only way to "grill the perfect hot dog at home every time?" I, for one, have serious consistency issues cooking them the old fashioned way. Sometimes I get ice cold, rubbery sausages, while other times I end up with charred sticks. But NOT any more!

And talk about luxury! Warm buns!! Surely this can't be for people of my socio-economic status... Since when I am entitled to perfect hot dogs AND warm buns all in the same meal? And yet, for a mere $49.95 plus shipping even a poor chump like myself can eat like a king, 3 meals a day, every single day! Put me down for two - one for the kitchen, and one for the office!

SkyMall

I have been flying quite a bit lately. One of the perks of flying is the SkyMall catalog that can be found in every seat back pocket. For the benefit of those not familiar with this fine publication, please suffer my explanation.

The SkyMall catalog is simply a magazine-like document containing ads and offers to purchase a large variety of merchandise offered by a plethora of merchants. The beauty, of course, is that you can purchase them from a single supplier, in theory saving shipping charges over ordering from individual retailers. While they offer some quite conventional goods, many of the items are "unique" or unusual items that you may not find in your typical department store. You can place your order on the plane (I believe through the flight attendants) or take the catalog and order at your convenience. In addition to a telephone order process, they also have a website.

Well, now that I've read the catalog for the 80th time, I have grown accustom to seeing certain items over and over again (there is a limited amount of rotation from issue to issue). Some items I actually think would be kind of cool, or at very least good for someone. On the other hand, many items seem quite pointless to me. I often make quips or wisecracks at these items. Unfortunately, no one is there to hear these wisecracks (unless any of my fellow passengers have mastered ESP).

And that is where you, the blog reader, come in. I have decided to start linking to some of the more interesting items and making my wise ass comments for the benefit of all the world. I intend to make a series of these posts as the mood strikes me. Who knows if I will be consistent. I only know it sounded like a good idea at the time I thought of it.

This post is already long enough, but rest assured that you will see some SkyMall related posts in the very near future.

Miss Teen South Carolina

Well, she may not be smart, but at least she's pretty:

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